self-Confidence Building Tips – Simple Guide!
If you asked 100 people the question what is confidence? you would get 100 different answers. But one thing’s for sure, most people want it or want more of it. Why? Because, quite simply, confidence is a life changer.
Confidence can really make the difference between success and failure. So, it’s not surprising that when we struggle to do something, it’s our ‘lack of confidence’ that often gets the blame.
Imagine confidence as a medicine. Imagine being able to have a good dose of it whenever you need it. Who would not want some of that?
We sometimes struggle to find ways to gain confidence in ourselves. But making a few small changes can really boost your confidence and make you feel more empowered.
Because here’s the thing: Most of us are doing our best on a daily basis. We try to be good spouses, good parents, good employees, good citizens, etc. So, we should feel confident in ourselves!
Here are 11 simple ways to feel more confident.
Disclaimer: I am not in any way a certified Councillor or Therapist so all the advice is given from my own experience.
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self-confidence building tips
Look after yourself
Self-care is the most neglected thing with the majority of people. We are so busy doing everything else and forget to look after ourselves.
What we don’t know is how important self-care is to everyday life. In this post, let’s see how self-confidence relates to self-care.
Self-confidence depends on a combination of a few things, such as
- Emotional health,
- Social health,
- And physical health.
Self-care, in simple terms, means taking good care of yourself, physically, emotionally, and socially, all balanced in that order.
When you practice self-care, you tend to feel good about yourself; you will have your ideal weight, you will know what makes you happy and what doesn’t, and you will understand yourself more deeply. This will help you in knowing how to tackle challenges as well.
So, look after yourself to help understand yourself better. Make time to exercise, meet friends, read, and practice all other examples of self-care you can read here.
Interested in learning more about self-care and how implementing it into your daily life can help you massively? Then see our posts below:
Block negative people
It’s universally accepted that we are own worst enemy, but some of us have a source of negativity in our lives that is toxic.
It will be much easier to be more positive and practice self-love if you are surrounded by people who care about your well-being.
People who constantly put you down, are critical of your behaviour, and judge your decisions will only be another obstacle for you to overcome.
Sometimes we are in situations where we can’t remove a negative person from our life. In that case, try hard to constantly be mindful of your own perception of your current situation and feelings about your life. Don’t let their negative words influence your mindset.
For others, it may be a certain behaviour that is contributing to the negativity in their lives. Such as social media, where we can constantly feel the need to compare ourselves and our lives to others.
While strongholds are hard to break free from, try your best to limit engaging in any activity that you know makes you feel bad about yourself.
Recognise negative thoughts and silence them
If you want to maximize your self-confidence, I recommend that you start to learn to silence any negative thoughts.
You need to stop them telling you that you can’t do it, that you don’t have what it takes.
Paying attention to discouraging thoughts that don’t believe in you automatically decreases your self-confidence and prevents you from acting.
Negative self-talk, it happens to all of us and it’s hard to control.
Those negative thoughts come to our mind, most of the time without us even knowing why. But that’s’ okay, don’t beat yourself up for that.
However, it’s really important that you learn how to recognize negative self-talk as soon as it occurs, in order to lessen its power.
When you’re able to identify negative thoughts, it’s then much easier not to listen to them and to replace them with neutral thoughts – or even better – with positive thoughts if you can.
When you’re able to recognise negative self-talk, you can finally ignore your inner critic!
So that’s why being self-aware of your own thoughts is so important!
Want to find out how practicing Mindfulness helped me with my negative thoughts? Then see below:
- Why is Mindfulness Important? – Read How Mindfulness Changed my life
- 8 Easy Mindfulness Activities – Simple Guide to Calm The Mind!
Some great channels that I use for mindfulness videos, are the following:
I also recommend the following books to read:
Practice positive thinking
Conversely, having a positive attitude is a true self-confidence builder.
Positive self-talk is encouraging.
Positive thoughts are like your own personal cheerleaders who believe in you and cheerfully support you, no matter what!
You can build a more positive mindset for example by not dwelling on negative experiences, replacing negative thoughts with positive ones and simply by switching your perspective and training yourself to see the glass half full.
Want to find out more bout how to develop a positive mindset? Then the see post below:
Trust your gut
Have you ever felt like you just knew something was off, but you went against your instinct and it felt dis-empowering? Seriously, if you ever have that feeling, trust your gut.
Push those other feelings aside and trust that you know what to do. In doing so you will focus on what you see/know/want and you will be able to hone your energy in on that idea; all your power will go there, and you’ll feel confident in your decision.
Believe in yourself
Start believing in yourself. It’s time to say I can and then go for it. Step outside of your comfort zone and trust in yourself.
Who cares what other people think of you while you make the decision to go for it! They can say what they want and they can hate on you, but ignore it.
It’s time to do things you’ve always wanted to do and take chances on things you are most afraid to go after.
In the end you don’t want to regret not taking the chance in the first place. Once you go for it and see what you are truly capable of then your self-esteem will boost.
Want to find out more about how slowing down and focusing on the present can help you be more confident? Then the see post below:
I remember when I started meditating sitting for 7 minutes was excruciatingly painful. Now I sit for 30/40 minutes and I love it (mostly).
Meditation was the doorway to so many new things for me. It taught me to be more present in my daily life. It taught me to witness or observe my thoughts and feelings instead of getting hooked by them. It taught me to hear my own soul speak. It helped me more confident and not get wrapped up in negative thoughts.
I knew my meditation practice was making a difference with how I am in my everyday life. I once had a short fuse and temper, but now I am a more peaceful person.
It has had a massive impact on my life.
Instead of having emotional meltdowns, over certain situations, I feel complete peace. I smile joyfully and takes things in my flow.
That is the power of meditation. It naturally turns you into a calmer, confident, more peaceful person. Make it a part of your daily routine.
The below channels on YouTube are great for guided meditations;
If you want to learn about meditation, the follow channel is excellent:
If you’re interested in learning more in-depth about meditation, then the below books are excellent:
List your successes
The best way to boost your confidence is to acknowledge your wins. No matter how big or small your personal accomplishments have been so far, don’t let yourself forget about them.
Keep your successes in mind by listing them down and placing that list where you can see it. It can be something small like finishing a book to something more significant like losing a bunch of weight. If you finished a certain school or you were successful in a project at your work, list it down!
Every time you feel self-doubt creeping into your mind, take a glance at your list of wins and you will notice a smile appearing on your face. If you did it in the past, chances are that you can do it again in the future. Keep that in mind and allow yourself to trust in your potential!
Don’t be in competition with others
Probably one of the easiest ways to feel like crap about yourself is to compare yourself to someone else. But we all have done it at some point.
We usually compare ourselves to people who have more than us, or seem happier than us, or are more fit than us (just to name a few).
What we need to do is focus on ourselves and if we want to (insert what you want here: have more money, to be more fit, be a better friend, be a better partner, etc.). Look inward, and remember that sometimes what we see is just the highlight reel of someone’s life.
We see the 20% that’s above the water, when the 80% that’s lurking below could be pretty bad.
Write down the things you like about yourself
Journaling might not be a habit for everyone to pick up but it will most likely help you if you give it a fair chance. You only need a few minutes every evening to write your thoughts on paper.
You can write about your day, emotions you experienced or thoughts you had. As long as you keep it in a positive note, you will transform journaling into a great dose of self-empowering.
Writing about yourself and your life in a positive manner will impact the way you understand yourself and also the way you treat yourself.
You might notice that you start to respect yourself more as your self-esteem is boosting with every page!
Learn to say no!
It’s that simple. Just say no to things, you don’t like or don’t want to do.
Stop people-pleasing. The only person you should be pleasing is you.
Saying Yes to people to save your relationship is a harmful habit which kills your confidence slowly.
There is a difference between helping others and being used. It is vital to know the difference between the two in order to honour yourself.
Every time you say no to something insignificant, you say yes to your priorities.
It is necessary to set boundaries within which you can grow. Say no to everything that tries to interfere with your growth and success.
We all can agree on one thing. Complements are amazing, and it makes a person feel so special.
You compliment other people. Right?
But do you compliment yourself or pat your back when you do something great? I believe not.
It’s never too late to start complimenting yourself for every little thing you do. You have every right to feel special.
Be the first person to acknowledge your hard work and compliment yourself.
Whenever someone else compliments you, accept it with a smile and believe in it. Take every complement very seriously.
Confidence is not about gaining something new; it is about respecting what you already have.
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Self-confidence building tips – Final thought
Remember, confidence is something you have to focus on and work on to improve.
It does not happen overnight but increasing your confidence is a wonderful thing for your life.
You can become the confident person you want to be! And remember that confidence boosting is a life long journey but you can do it.
What are your tips for building your confidence? I would love to hear them.
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